Lately my dreams have become more nightmarish. Wednesday night I dreamed about fighting cannibals while I slept for 9 hours. When I woke up I felt like had been fighting them for a long time. This morning I dreamed a giant spider woman was sitting on me and kissing me. She had me pinned down so tightly that I could not move even when she finally turned into a man-sized black widow spider and kept french kissing me as I awoke. When I woke up I found that the cats had piled on top and against me so that I was pinned down against the wall. So the fuzzy spider french kissing me turned out to just be fuzzy cats sitting near my face. The bad taste in my mouth was just from the cold I've been catching. The spider queen dream is probably related to an anime with a black widow spider woman I had watched right before bedtime. Also my naturalist nephew came over late last night for beer and pizza and I showed him a live spider that had crawled into my bed. My nephew assured me that the spider species was beneficial to humans and we turned him loose again across the man cave from my bed.
If they turn violent, then my dream blogs on several occasions have raised a social media flag and then some moderator or medical professional tries to tell me online or on my Facebook that it could be symptomatic of some brain abnormality that requires that I get a CAT scan to diagnose. So then they urge me to go out and to find some quack in order that he may diagnose me with something like early Parkinsonian dementia or late onset Bipolar disorder, either of which would slap me on many public Not-Wanted lists for hiring, insurance, and credit Please piss off moderators. I am neither out-of-control nor violent. Now, I frequently do have many violent dreams from my early struggles with childhood depression (I almost starved myself to death twice as an adolescent), from my early martial arts training (to help the anxiety), from my time as a homeless teenaged street fighter, from my parkour and other physical training in my late college days (I was hit by lightning at least a dozen times while running to school. Countless sports injuries), and perhaps from occasional alternative medical therapies that I prefer to traditional mental health treatments for my depression and anxiety (Group therapy sucks). IMAO I DO NOT have violent dreams because of any organic disorder. They are simply a part of my private identity. I am a big and heavy fighter and not a lover, that's all. I still adore cats, so that should induce at least a few bosses to trust me like my college adviser did. He said that anyone who loved cats like I do can't be all bad, and then he forgave me for my roughhousing to take me on as his student. Sometimes you just have to trust that the person is good even if he doesn't feel right to you. That's what I am.
As an aside, the only alternative medicine that is really completely safe to blog about online is acupressure with skin heat treatments. Even acupuncture has risks involved when performed by an amateur or by someone who isn't licensed. For example, if I blog that I have used youtube to watch a strobe animation with a binaural beat added, then I am considered at risk for seizures while driving Youtube even has warnings added to that effect (watch yourself for 30 days). If I blog about my psychotropic experiments with alternative medical treatments here then maybe I can't donate blood products or sign government contracts anymore. I am not interested in turning my offline identity into some sort of pariah. So I must also leave any hallucinogenic dreams out of my online, semi-public dream diary. Sex dreams are ok.
