Elly Stone, French alleys, cathedral, demons, Feynman diagrams dreams

   Dream diary update. I didnt intend on making a blog entry so soon on the tails of my last entry 1 week ago. The dream I woke up w/ this morning was odd enough that I felt it required at least some remarks, though reluctantly. Instead of leaping to my diary immediately I postponed writing about it a few hours. So I won't be bothered remembering any deep details or grand thematic transformations that I know were there, since they are in almost all of my dreamsleep. I can mostly just recall the moments leading up to my awakening.
   My dream was filled with sounds, colors, and music. Intermittently throughout played the entire music soundtrack from the film "Jacques Brel is Alive and Well and Living in Paris"(1975), by Elly Stone.

A warbling Ms Stone in a low cut red evening gown was one of my major love interests for the dream. I can distinctly recall making love to her while she stood facing me singing to the back alleys of Paris.
   Much of the last part of the dream occurred in a giant cathedral space. Demons sought to distract and assault me, but they became repeatedly confused by my successful efforts at materializing multidimensional Feynman quantum diagrams before us. I was working on a key for establishing a string theorem of multiverse. I won at my efforts before they could assault me. So the demons regrouped outside the warping space I was in, shrugged, and left. Then my moving Feynman diagrams expanded between my fingertips and exploded. There was a white light all around me and I could feel the solar winds against my face once again as I awoke. It was around 5:15 AM CDT. The cats were resting on top of me and got up to be let out.
   For dream elements the French music & caterwauling lover are easily explained: I like French girls. I'm 25% French so I find I have better luck w/ dating some of them. The Stone movie is not one of my favorites, but it reminds me of fucking those punk French girls. The demons are somewhat harder to explain. Before bedtime I watched Svengoolie on MeTV w/ my visiting nephew. The flick last night was Hammer horror classic "Curse of the Werewolf" starring Oliver Reed. Reed also had had starring roles in the rock musical "Tommy" & as the adulterous priest in Ken Russel's "The Devils."

Coincidentally, my nephews is also named Tommy thanks to that movie. So I figure that watching that Oliver Reed/Hammer horror movie w/ my nephew combined w/ watching amusing Halloween demon porn clips after he left brought "The Devils" & sexy Yvonne Romain to my dream.

   The complex Feynman diagram spatial transformations are the most difficult dream elements to explain. I guess its safest just to say that I used to study that, in French, and parts of my dream were spoken entirely in French and Latin.

Childish dreams, darker realities, ghosts, lost cat dreams

   ICYMI In my last post I said that my beloved cat disappeared on Oct 4. I also wrote that I considered abandoning this blog because I feared it would drive me mad. In this post I plan to clarify those remarks and update post some of the dreams I was and am having.
   Before Oct 3 I had been planning to write a new dream diary post. Most of my dreams at the time seemed trivial, almost childish. I had dreams about kittens, rainbows, childhood, balloons, surfing, flying, wild animals, snow flakes and snow globes. Occasionally I had a dream w/ politicians or actors from tv doing vaudeville skits. I dreamed that Clint Eastwood was training me to shadow box w/ an empty chair, sort of a combo of Million Dollar Baby & SNL. I dreamed that Paul Ryan tried to get me to play straight man while he cracked welfare queen and anchor baby jokes while dressed as Dracula. During these weeks in my waking life I had been developmentally regressing. My parents divested from me entirely financially in July. I worked a few PT jobs for a neighbor but nothing inconvenient. I was spending a lot of time cuddling & talking w/ my cats while watching tv.
   BTW Oct 3 was the date of the first Presidential debate. Against my better judgement I watched it and microblogged on tumblr & twitter into the wee hours of Oct 4. Around midnight I let my cat out into the garage. She normally didn't go outside at this time, since she was of a gentler homebound disposition and a natural coward. I read twitter and dropped off intermittently throughout the night. Around 4 am I noticed she was gone and around 8:30 AM I became alarmed. I felt very guilty since I had been having beautiful dreams about celebrating a moonlight festival w/ her and the other cats until dawn, sort of replaying the hobbit feast from LOTR-1 in the dream w/ little cat people instead of hobbits and no wizard.
   In the following weeks my dreams took on several dark themes. I was dispassionately OCD about her loss, officially mourning the week after. I had dreams about fire and death, drowning and blood. I dreamed repeatedly about the ghost of the dead boy who used to have my bedroom. I dreamed that his head leaped on to my bed like a cat and argued w/ me about what a loser I am. I had all sorts of dreams about what must have happened to my missing cat. In retrospect IMAO its most probable that she was killed by our neighbor's giant black Newfoundland mastiffs, i.e., "Newfies," and he covered it up and disposed of the body.
   Our neighbor is a selfish bastard w/ an exotic animal fetish who likes to break ordinance and let them run loose in town here so they can snatch up free food. Animal control took the gator away and we are feeding the white peacock. I refuse to feed his giant dogs tho they frequently steal my cat's food if I'm not looking. Both of the "starving gentle giant" mastiffs look like this:

No doubt its lucky for him they weren't hunting small children at the primary school playground 100 m away.
    My naturalist nephew found some photos of the missing cat on his cell. She was extremely fond of me and begged to be held for rocking hugs and kisses no less than 5 times on the date of her disappearance. Her name was Skanky, pictured here w/ kittens and mate:

In the intervening weeks I've done everything short of posting a reward poster. It didn't make sense to post one since we thought we had no photos & she is colored a common Tabby variety so I'd get 15 wrong responses. I plan to make one now I think.
   Last weekend I started thinking maybe traveling Satanists got my cat. The main reason is this story about a dog dumped out nearby w/ acid all over her face burning off her flesh. Also my cat disappeared on Oct 4, World Animal Day, which is set on the catholic calendar Feast Day for St Francis of Assisi (patron Saint of animals). Satanists like to schedule their desecrations around the catholic calendar. Third there have been other inexplicably similar Satanic attacks on pets in Europe this month here, here, and here. Fourth my next-door neighbor's cute kitten was snatched 17 nights after mine, also in the wee hours of Sunday Oct 21 between midnight and 2 AM. He claims there was a car of traveling strangers parked there when he got home who must have sped away w/ his cat. Fifth there have been a mysterious October string of church-type vandals circa to our exact region here and here. IMAO It is insufficient to rule out Satanic sacrifice of our pets near Halloween simply because they are not black colored. I attended high school w/ several Satanists and they are still rumored to be in our town.
   It is more likely to be the reckless exotic pets neighbor though, since he has since ceased to turn the mastiffs loose for the rest of the month after the second cat. IMAO It is a wicked world, with much unwholesome pain visited by uprooted humans. I don't enjoy dreaming vividly every night about my cat being tortured and stuffed by wicked humans or pulled apart screaming in the dark by foaming hounds. It is reminiscent of the nightmare work of horror directors Clive Barker and Dario Argento.

Return to dream diary blog, Differences in Liberal & Conservative brains

   Well, I almost abandoned this blog this time. There are several reasons why. The main one is that I felt that dwelling too much on my dreams would drive me mad. A recent dream study shows that political Liberals tend to have much more vivid dreams & troubled sleep than political Conservatives do. Well I am about as Liberal as they come. In addition my brain may be more susceptible to bizarre dreams in other ways. I also felt that it was a good time to leave off the dream diary and focus more on my political blogging and other online studies.  One of the reasons I stayed in school for so many years (26 for college) is that concentrating & focusing regularly on my studies helps distract me from these internal disturbances.
    I am extremely Liberal w/ an IQ measured  in the 170-195 range, a creative IQ est in the 180s, and w/ an open and natural values system from my tolerant familial & social environment. I figured that anything that stimulates my pronounced Liberalism is bound to make me feel about as enlightened as Gandhi and theoretically as creative as Picasso. Alternatively, obsessing over the latest dream diary post at night after an internal freak show every 2 hours was making my sleep interruptions worse. I'd end up passing out at odd times and unable to plan tasks. I even lost track of one of my beloved cats, who was taken from here while I was in one such fainting state on the early morning of Oct 4. In the following post I'll go into some of the disturbing dream images I've been trying very hard to forget. I'll also go into more details on the subject of my missing cat.
    Other studies show that Liberal brains become more compassionate & open w/ political activity, while Conservatives tend to further close their minds w/ the same social activity. I understand that "open" and "closed" are relative terms, but that's just paraphrasing the way it was newscast to me. So for me switching blogs seemed like a win-win. My unpleasant disequilibrium in the dream diary would become remote in my thoughts and my daily focus instead on my twitter and tumblr blogs would make me more compassionate and creative. Here's enumeration lists on the relative behavioral differences and neuroanatomy of Liberal and Conservative brains. Coincidentally, political research shows that gullible voters tend to trust numbered lists implicitly, so politicians will frequently argue points in 3's when seeking to lull their minds to acceptance.

Valkyries, ravens, demon bears, Bast, Nile boat dreams

Dream diary update. Well I've been doing my best to forget my dreams again. I purposely avoid making entries in this blog more than once a month. My dreams this past month have varied from heaven to hell and back again. I had a dream last week that was so vivid I thought it was real. I was in a beautiful landscape with Valkyries trying to prevent me from leaving. I turned into a raven to fly away from them and they turned into swans. Somehow I flew sideways into a dark river and the world turned 90 degrees as I emerged back home in Middle-Earth as I awoke.

   Last night I had a dream about fighting demon-bears around 4 AM. I was really tearing the shit out of them, typically disemboweling a scowling demon-bear with one stroke of my sword. The slaughter was so one-sided that I took a young nephew as a page and trained him to do it. He had just disemboweled his demon-grizzly with a single stroke for the first time when I awoke.

 
Swirly kitten was curled up on top of me nibbling my nose. She wanted pet for about an hour while I chatted with my real nephew.
   I fell asleep again around 8 AM, this time with Swirly's mother, Skanky cat, wanting to cuddle. I had a dream about the violin from Rouge et Bleu again. It's one of my favorite clips from Classic Arts Showcase that was playing when I awoke from the demon-bears dream at 4 AM.

The violin was playing throughout my dream, which involved me spending time with my lover Bast while floating on a Nile junk made of papyrus together. I thought we might make love when I awoke. Skanky cat was putting deeply on my spine and periodically licking my neck and nibbling my ears.

TM, water elemental, beasts, cat girl, dark angel, Hell dreams

   Dream diary update. I had a few God dreams early last week. When I have dreams that are filled with Transcendental Meditation imagery or ancient mythologies then I call them God dreams. I had a dream about being a water elemental. Another couple of dreams about animals. I dreamed I was a fox.

A couple of dreams about croc, water moccasin, giraffes and of course cats. I had a sex dream about doing a hot cat girl Friday.

   Mostly though I've been having dreams about Hell again  I had a dream Saturday afternoon about being savaged and ripped to shreds in the dusk sky by flying dark angels. One of them swooped up & dived down like an eagle to finish me off as I awoke.

 Today I passed out late this afternoon and I dreamed about being hammered, clawed, and tortured by old people in this huge dark mansion. The mansion was like the one from the Fall of The House of Usher but bigger and taller, almost like a mountain cathedral. The two old ladies were about to claw out my throat. One of them went for my right eye & the other disemboweled me as I awoke.

I've been dreaming about old people a lot lately, probably because I only socialize daily with my parents. Nevertheless I felt magickally charged up after this dream. I'm pretty used to Hell dreams by now. Also I woke up with the cats taking shelter in my bed so I was quite peaceful. When I brought them outside the white peacock flew up in a tree above the roof and joined us out front. He's been roosting on the back porch. I think he likes the cat food and bird seed I set out there regularly with the water bowls.

Plasma arc choral ensemble, Ghosts of Mars space program dreams

Dream diary update. I put off making my next entry too long. I had some real wild dreams last week but now I've forgotten most of them. Anyway 2 days ago I had a dream where I was mage like Gandalf the Grey. I empowered a little girl & her monster friend to sing opera together. I did it by arching a plasma arc of white power over them.

Their music was a haunting mishmash of 3 other music snippets. The first was the lyrical version of "Oh, Didn't He Ramble!" by Mr Louis Armstrong:

The second music snippet was a massive choral arrangement of"Jupiter: The Bringer Of Jollity" by Gustav Holst

I couldn't place the third music snippet in my dream composition but I suspect it was Con Te Partiro

   Just now I had another dream about a private space ship group, not SpaceX, responsible for helping our migration to Mars. Like in the films MIB 3 & in Empire Strikes Back, I helped the Apollo 11-style, Saturn V rocket ships take off. I felt the thunderous roar of their take off exhaust vibrating against my head. They lifted off into the brilliant blue sky while a sun ray arched across the horizon as I awoke.

Dolphin Aflockalypse, fracking Piasa bird, dead megacity, zombies, evil priests, demon boy, gothic lolita vampires dreams

I've been neglecting the dream diary again, this time for 3 weeks. 2 weeks ago I couldn't get rid of the dream images of swimming with zombie dolphins and walking up to beached whales. I suppose it was because of reading about the thousands of Aflockalypse kills in Peru due to offshore oil & gas exploration.

   I also dreamed about poisoned scaly deer with red eyes and a man's face chasing me. They were angry about all the US natural gas fracking ruining their forests and watersheds. An Illini native American medicine man saved me from the dream deer beasts before turning into a crow and flying up and away. I had forgotten about the legend of the Piasa bird but I woke up from those dreams remembering it.

   Last week I started dreaming about being lost walking or working through dead cities. Frequently I would find myself repeating the same steps over and over again throughout the dream until the world exploded around me. As if the emptiness of existence in the dead megacity of my dreams made daily life a set of meaningless rote trials.

   This week in addition to giant megacities I also started dreaming about zombies, evil priests, demon boys, and gothic lolita vampire girls. No doubt this dream trend is from my watching weird Japanes horror animes again. I started up this hobby after watching the Avengers movie last Tuesday for my sister's birthday present. Still I suppose its better to populate my dream megacities with bloodthirsty rogue characters than to just leave them empty except for laborers like myself. Still this dream trend is almost as absurd as when I used to dream repeatedly about being chased by Ms PacMan, a video game I mastered decades ago as an adolescent. I've been telling myself how stupid my dreams are all month, even though I often feel they beckon me involuntarily back to sleep.